look to where you want to go
When I was a little girl and Dad was teaching me how to ride a bike he gave me some of the most important advice of my life.
“Look to where you want to go.”
I was probably about six or seven, young enough to think that pink streamers on my handlebars were a must have (although I’m 33 now and streamers still sound pretty vital).
I was wobbly and awkward at first, but when Dad said those words my whole experience became a lot easier. I had something to focus on. My mind stopped jumping all over the place trying to figure out how the hell I could get this contraption to go forward. I had a process to my goal now. If I looked left it would make it a whole lot easier to turn left without wobbling and falling over. If I wanted to move forward then I focused my eyes ahead of me, not alongside myself, and definitely not behind me.
So, if you want to move forward in your life, your business, your relationship — look ahead of you.
If you spend all your time looking behind you, not only will you not make any progress forward but you’ll end up turning around altogether. Looking in the past is important as a reminder to see how far you’ve come but you don’t want to spend all your time there. You’ll end up stagnant, stuck in a mess of nostalgia and overwhelm. Remember, your past does not define who you are. It happened to you, but it is not currently you. Use pieces of it to propel yourself forward, but don’t let it hold you back.
Where you look is where you will go.
If you spend all your time looking alongside yourself you’ll end up in a loop of comparison. Nothing good comes from comparing yourself to others — you’ll either put others down or yourself down, and neither of those are going to serve your best self. Your experience is simply that, yours. Own it. Make it the most true to you and what you want out of your life. Don’t spend a second trying to live someone else’s. It is a literal waste of time, of precious time in your life.
You have the power to be who you want to be, to move forward in all areas of your wonderful and interesting life. Just keep looking forward — to where you want to go.
P.S. Thanks Dad.